Posts Tagged ‘Coaching’

The Cure

We think we get over things.
We don’t get over things.
Or say, we get over the measles
but not a broken heart.
We need to make that distinction.
The things that become part of our experience
never become less a part of our experience.
How can I say it?
The way to “get over” a life is to die.
Short of that, you move with it,
let the pain be pain,
not in the hope that it will vanish
but in the faith that it will fit in,
find its place in the shape of things
and be then not any less pain but true to form.
Because anything natural has an inherent shape
and will flow towards it.
And a life is as natural as a leaf.
That’s what we’re looking for:
not the end of a thing but the shape of it.
Wisdom is seeing the shape of your life
without obliterating (getting over) a single
instant of it.

–Albert Huffstickler

This poem was posted by, Mark Fleming, a colleague who I met and worked with many years ago. I have had no contact with Mark other than the poems he posts on social media.

Today this poem had a profound effect on me.

I the past couple of hours I have read this poem over and over again. The emotions, memories and visions of my life that this poem evoked have been unnerving and at the same time liberating and strengthening.

To be told there is a “cure” for trauma, hurt and grief, has always enraged me. To the told “get over it” has enraged me even more viscerally than being told there is a cure for what I feel and experience.

The profound effect of this poem is the affirmation in seeing the natural flow of life, the good and the bad. There is something in me that bursts with joy, power, strength and courage when I can shift my mind to seeing the “WISDOM” that can be found in experience. The “WISDOM” that can be found in every form of the experience of life, pain and happiness, rejection and acceptance, peace and chaos. Each of these expressions of life has a form and when I can nurture the experience, the expression rather than obliterating, “getting over”, I am able to bring myself into the flow of life and experience.

Perhaps this poem, and remembering the words, savouring the meaning, will allow me to be able to find the “form and shape” in the pain that that has flowed through my life. Perhaps in remembering this poem, I will be able to bring my pain IN, allow my pain to be a part of me, rather than “getting over” my pain and “obliterating” my pain.










Loving you from here.


About Albert Huffstickler ~

“In 1988, Richard Lance Williams wrote in The Austin Chronicle about Huffstickler’s poetry, commenting that “travelling [had] instilled in him a great tolerance for the diversity of human behavior and a deep understanding of how a rootless life can drive one to insanity.” As Williams noted, “his poetry reflect this diversity.” “Long or short, elegies or curses, comic or obscene, sad or jubilant, but always in his vocabulary of ideas,” Williams continued, “his poems speak to the longing of a human for an understanding of their place in this strange, dangerous universe.” After another interview with Huffstickler in 1989, Williams commented on Huffstickler’s interest in “the artist’s blessing, the curse; why artists have to create because the terror is so great, the universe without them so incomprehensible, too comprehensible….” As he requested in a poem, Huffstickler’s ashes were scattered in an arroyo outside of Santa Fe, New Mexico, and by chance or fate, the arroyo turned out to be on Hyde Park Road. As Williams’s eulogy concluded, Huff remains “a soul who even now is on a bus somewhere between here and eternity.”

Photo of Albert Huffstickler, taken in 1999

Photo of Albert Huffstickler, taken in 1999











December 2012 Update from Phillip Coupal and the Awaken Studio
Current Events and New Offerings for Men Who LOVE Men

Please find below the news update for December 2012

Phillip Coupal and the Awaken Studio

News Update

December 2012

Web View

Building Community Here In Toronto
Erotic Explorations – Tantric Experiments – Sex Education
If you are: a man who loves men. A man who is looking for full bodied experiences of connection with other men. If you are a seeker, an adventurer and simply wish to take part in events that explore the connection between our erotic nature and our divine self then please explore further on the website. .
or complete listings of the events in December and January read further through this News Update. If you have a question or need more information I would be happy to hear from you. Please feel free to email me at

Seeking Community 
Awaken Studio – 270 Carlaw Avenue, Unit 102, Toronto Ontario

The number one comment or question that I receive on a daily basis asks for and about community. Where do men go to find community?

A community that is honest towards the nature and desires of men who love men. A community where you can be naked if you choose. A community where you can be honest about your thoughts, feelings and desires AND you can be in an environment that is Safe, Sane and Conscious. A community where there is little artifice and you are welcome to be yourself without a lot of role play and posturing. A place in the world where all of you is welcome.

At the Awaken Studio, the events and space have been designed for and actively seek the creation of a community of men who love men right here in Toronto. Join in and be a part of this new venture. Come on IN and be yourself.

Below please find listings for the December events at the Awaken Studio. If you wish to attend any of these events please visit the website page for the event that has caught your interest. You will find that it is very easy to register and pay through the event registration page. If for any reason you are uncertain, have a question or simply need more information email me at

Please know that, however you join, however you find your way in, I look forward to this big adventure in building community and I am grateful and glad to be of service to you.

– December Events –

Men 4 Men Touch Exchange
Sunday December 16, 2012
The Monthly Touch Exchange event is scheduled for Sunday afternoon December 16th from 1:00 pm until 6:00 pm.

Join with a group of like hearted men.

Participants will give and receive a touch that explores Taoist Erotic Massage techniques as taught by Joseph Kramer. These techniques designed to build and move energy through the body, offering a full body experience and leading for further knowledge of pleasure and desire.

The fee for this event is $40.00.

Register on Line

LIFE Force – Creative Source for Men
Wednesday Evenings December 5, 12 and 19 

Seek the wisdom of your body and discover the creative energy and your internal LIFE force. See what the pleasure of touch can offer your spirit.
From 7:00 pm until 10:00 pm.

Experiential Erotic Education

Participants will explore desire, pleasure and awakening energy through erotic touch, tantric experiment and stimulation of sensual and sensory awareness.
The fee for this event is $50.00.

LIFE Force –  for Men Movement
Thursday Evenings December 6, 13 and 20

Breath, Movement and Meditation.

Focused and facilitated exercises to awaken Kundilini LIFE force energy and stimulate energetic movement through the energy centers of the body.
From 7:00 pm to 8:30 pm

awaken LIFE Force energy in your body

Participants will move through a guided experience designed to stimulate energy and creative LIFE Force.

The fee for this event is $10.00

Celebration and Dance – Welcoming 2013

Monday December 31, 2012

This is a community event. Please bring guests and introduce yourself and them to the Awaken Studio. This is an open-house style event. There will be guests from all walks of life and all genders and identities.

Celebrating the New Year we will defy some conventions and honour others. By Dancing we will wake energy in our body, shake off the past, acknowledge where we have been, moving fluidly as we get warmed up for what will come along.

Celebrating, Honouring and Welcoming the New Year and all it offers.

There is no fee for this event. Prior online registration is required

Register on Line

New Years 2013 Heart Circle for Men
Tuesday afternoon January 1, 2013

Join in this Community event for all who identify as men. Share and be witnessed with, what you are letting go of from the Old Year and bring forward what you are embracing for the New Year.
Bring yourself into a Community of Like Hearted Men
Brave and Willing to Share from their Heart
We will gather and mingle until 4:00 and then as the sun is setting we will perform a heart ritual to welcome the new year. We will have time to mingle again after the circle ritual to begin the transition into the new.
Welcome to 2013
There is no admission fee for this event.
Please bring a Food Bank Donation.
Prior online  registraiton is required.

– Upcoming Future and Special Events –

New Years at the Awaken Studio
December 31, 2012 and January 1, 2013

Please join in celebrating the the joy and pleasure of building community.

New Years 2013 offers both Celebration and Heart felt sharing.

Check the website for information and registration. New Years 2013

LIFE Force – Creative Source for Men
Wednesday Evenings Beginning January 9th 

Starting in January 2013 Wednesday evenings are a Salon for Men who LOVE Men and enjoy physical, erotic, sexual and spiritual connections with other men. These salons are for those who wish to share their journey and their pursuit of spirit in several realms.

The 9th will begin a monthly discussion group exploring Body Awareness.  Other Wednesday evenings will feature groups exploring: Spiritual Pursuits January 16th, Touch January 23rd  and Artistic Expression on January 30th.

Please check the website for the details of each of these continuing offerings.

LIFE Force –  Movement for Men
Thursday Evenings from January 10th

These Thursday evening sessions will continue the journey into the body that was begun in the fall of 2012.

Breath, Movement and Meditation. Focused and facilitated exercises to awaken Kundilini LIFE force energy and stimulate energetic movement through the energy centers of the body.
From 7:00 pm to 8:30 pm

awaken LIFE Force energy in your body

Participants will move through a guided experience designed to stimulate energy and creative LIFE Force.

The fee for this event is $10.00

Visit the calendar page, choose your evening and register on line at your convenience.

January Weekend & Full Day Events
Awaken Studio will host 3 events on weekends through January 2013.


Afternoon event

Men 4 Men Touch Exchange
1:00 pm to 6:00 pm Sunday January 13

Weekend event
Experiential Embodied Erotic Exploration 
Taoist Erotic Massage and Genital Touch
Friday January 18, Saturday January 19 and 20

Single Day Weekend event
Exquisite Connections for Men
9:30 am to 5:300 pm Saturday January 26

Create Your OWN Kama Sutra
July 14th to 21st 2013.

Brand new and in uncharted territory the 7 day and 7 evening offering is a wholly new community event. This event will begin with an afternoon gathering on the 14th and conclude with lunch on the 21st.
a full 7 days and 7 evenings of erotic exploration.
Find new paths to your centers of pleasure.
Begin the journey into the temple of your body, discover new connections through desire into your spirit body and the depth of your soul.
If you know someone who might benefit from this newsletter, the website, or the services that are provided byPhillip Coupal – Counselling + Coaching + Bodywork and the Awaken Studio,  please feel free to pass this update along.
If you are not currently subscribed at and you would like to receive monthly email updates from Phillip Coupal and the Awaken Studio you will need to Subscribe and join the website.

Be well and play safe. Sent with LOVE, honour and respect. Namaste Phillip
Experiential Embodied Erotic Explorations - Toronto

Experiential Embodied Erotic Explorations – Toronto

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 Copyright © 2012 Phillip Coupal – Counselling + Coaching + Bodywork . All rights reserved.
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This time of year is always like the beginning to me. Transition is in the air.

The earth is preparing for the fall, trees and fruit and flowers are pulling the juice from the earth to enrich themselves, the light is changing in the sky, the weather moves in unfamiliar patterns and I feel like this is the transition into a new time.

And YES! this really is the transition into a new time. There is much to prepare for and lots to dream and scheme and plot and plan and get ready for. I pull the juice from my earth to ripen and enrich my experience.

September will bring a Body Electric workshop to Toronto that we have not had in many years. October will bring some new events into my coaching practice. November will bring some new elements as the Body Electric is here in Toronto again and I will be introducing some new elements into my breath and bodywork practice. December brings a trip to a meeting to plan for the NEW Body Electric and I am excited and happy for this great opportunity.

The real New Year will bring many new elements, several co-creations and of course there will be surprise.

I adore that all around me is getting ready for harvest. The fruit on the vine and branch is developing juice and flesh to burst forth with the ripe sweetness of the fall.

Today I will savour the summer and be active in preparing for the next transition. Loving and laughing and smiling as I live and breath.

Heart on Olive Wood

For information about my work, my Counselling and Coaching practice or the Bodywork for Men that I offer please contact me at or visit my website at:

I have been stuck so many times in my life and I absolutely refuse to get hung up and stuck ever again.

Sometimes life can reach out and deliver a gentle tap, sometimes a solid punch and sometimes a big huge slap across the face. The slap across the face thing is kind how I feel right now and you know I am going to take it in and then MOVE ALONG.

Previously I would have moaned and groaned and wallowed in the dust. I choose to do radically different now, the energy is simply not worth going to that low defeated place. NOW, I simply revel in getting up, dusting off and getting back up on the horse and riding strong.

No matter what might be delivered, the tap or the punch or the slap. I am not going to waste my time, my life energy, whallowing, especially when I know, deep inside, that all of my life is worth fighting for, worth living richly and feeling fully, and totally worth getting up on that horse and riding strong.

Passion, Determination, Force of Will.


❤ the Juicy Heart


To find out about how Coaching can help you through what LIFE delivers.

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The Summer Equinox! Summer is here…

Time to play some more… Work and Play!

Choosing to be JUICY again today.

❤ The Juicy Heart


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